Rape culture also sets the bar so incredibly low that it allows men to perform the barest minimum and still feel good about themselves and expect women to be impressed. It’s precisely the existence of violent men that grants ‘good’ guys awards for basic decency.
Ain’t this the truth! I find myself impressed by things that I later realize are just baseline respect. It’s so infuriating, but I’m getting better at not being so reactive.
Reflecting back on moments where I may have reacted thankfully to something like this always brings me the realization that I may have possibly reinforced a man’s idea that he is over-the-top compassionate for an act that cost him nothing. Then I start to spiral into thoughts like “ could I have added to his entitlement or ego?”
The very fact that these nonviolent yet insidious social situations are a result of this culture pains me to no end. Why are we paying for this in almost every aspect of our lives?